January 26, 2007

General Hospital - The Cutting Room Floor


With this unique approach GH is taking to the cataclysmic, Metro Court blowing sweeps shows, it was inevitable that some scenes would end up being edited.  That being the case, I thought I'd use my special, high powered, backstage kryptonite (hahaha, who knew 'kryptonite' would be in spell check...?  I LOVE America!!), almighty, monster slaying, budget balancing, glowing Press Pass of Power to scoop up and repair the clipped out scenes for our own amusement and ridicule.  These are from today's episode.


Lucky to Elizabeth (as Nikolas, Emily and Spencer walk away to with the pediatrician for the baby's post-kidnapping check up): "I can't imagine anything worse than having your pillow - er - I mean your child kept from you." [Holds Maxie's fake baby pillow up close to his face and whimpers, then strokes it and coos reassuringly to it.]


Elizabeth: "I can't tell you how hard I've prayed for this moment when Spencer would be home safe and Nikolas would have a piece...I mean 'some peace.'"


Sam to Alexis: "You know, Alexis, if you need any help...If you need me to testify on your behalf at the custody hearing and tell the judge about that night I spent with Ric... I'll be happy to do it. I haven't talked about it in absolutely ages and I'd love to relive it.  *sigh*"


Kelly Lee: "If I had my way, we'd be licking whipped cream off the abs of a hot stripper in Atlantic City."


Robin: "Well, Kelly, that's because you're a slutty nasty whore."


Detective Rodriguez: "Did someone say 'slutty, nasty, whore?'"


Alfred: "Welcome home! It's so wonderful to have you back again without that crazy nanny and with me having another scene. I'll be in the Bat Cave polishing the silver if you need me."


Emily to Elizabeth: "We can do twosies!! OMG!!  I never expected that I would fall back in love with Nikolas and if you would just fall back in love with Lucky, we could TOTALLY be like twins!! Lucky has been sober for absolutely HOURS and you HAVE to take him back! You have to, you have to you HAVE TO... SQUEEEEEE!!!!!"


Carly to Sonny: "What are you doing here."


Sonny: "I live here, did you forget?"


Carly: "This is the Metro Court, you asshole, you don't live here."


Sonny: "Um... I said I work here."


Carly: "You said you LIVE here and you don't, now stop following me."


Sonny: "I work here."


Carly: "No you DON'T, stalker freak."


Sonny: "You're so hot when you're pissed." 


Carly:  *stare*


Jason Thompson to John J. York: "Aww, you grew your little duck tail back while you were not getting scenes!"


Patrick: "She's kept me sane since I pricked myself with that needle."


Mac: "Don't use the word 'prick' when you are talking about my niece. Besides, I thought your cut yourself with a scalpel, not a needle."


Patrick: "Yeah, well, I thought you had an Australian accent."


Mac: "Meh, whatcha gonna do?"

Sam to Dayplayer GYN Doc (Since Kelly Lee is in jail): "I know it says in my charts somewhere that a couple of years ago I had a placental abruption, but we waited as promised and now we've been trying to get pregnant for positively days and I'm still not knocked up, so I came in to see what gives."


Dayplayer GYN Doc: "Well, it does take longer when you're not having sex with Sonny Corinthos and when you know who the father would be. You would have had a much better chance of getting pregnant if you were still sleeping with your stepdaddy."


At least that's how it SHOULD have been.