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October 14, 2006 Sam,
you ignorant SLUT!!! You have been a sniveling, needy, insecure, whiny little tart, who has been insufferable for MONTHS! Now you’re downright intolerable! I can totally understand why Alexis is mortified at having you for a daughter. (Aside from the fact that she caught you bumping uglies with her husband, I mean.) Carly did it much better, and with far more style than you ever could, and you didn't even have the perceived baggage Carly had for wanting revenge on her mother. (Trust me, I'm not excusing Carly by any means!) But come on! So Alexis called a duck a duck, and told you she was sick of your pathetic neediness and constantly blaming of her for everything that ever went wrong in the world and for allowing your resentment to poison the air Molly and Krystina were breathing. So WHAT?! It's nothing you haven't been told before. The truth hurts...sometimes. So Sam, to make yourself feel better, you go and shag your step-daddy, a man you absolutely LOATHE and had been PLANNING to shag for a good long while, in order to punish your evil Mommy for daring to give a damn about whether you live or die, or end up shot in the head while trying to deliver your own future-baby at some point down the road. Then you immediately turn it around and make it seem like step-daddy was in on the nasty shag-fest all by his onesie, and you encourage everyone else to believe that, too. Yes, Alexis can be equally insufferable with her need to be controlling, but at least we know, and can understand her motives, reasoning, and pathology for turning out that way. With Mikkos for a father and Helena for a stepmother, not to mention Stavros for a brother…I’m surprised Alexis has any capacity for normalcy at all. Add to that the fact that her father MADE her give up her baby, thereby taking away her power to choose for herself, and it’s understandable why Alexis feels so compelled to control everything about her life. At least that control comes from a place of love and caring. Her execution may suck, and suck BIG time, but there’s no denying that she cares deeply. Fast forward a couple of weeks/months and many, many back and forth, tearful conversations with the object of your obsession, Jason, (come back, leave me alone, yes, no, go, stay...) and we get Sam’s indignant What do you MEAN you may have impregnated another woman?! "How could you do this?" WTF?! YOU HAD DIRTY, DRUNKEN REVENGE SEX WITH YOUR STEPFATHER IN YOUR MOMMY'S LIVING ROOM, biotch, and you have the nerve to ask how Jason could do this?! How could YOU, after promising not to say a word to anyone about Jason, (the man you claim to love and can’t live without, and who promised never to say anything about you having dirty sex with your stepdaddy and have kept that promise) and Elizabeth's indiscretion, go and whine, cry and blab their secret to your cousin, Elizabeth’s BROTHER-IN-LAW, just cause you’re jealous and insecure and unhappy? I notice you didn’t admit what YOU did that same night, so you can’t say that Jason and Elizabeth’s secret just slipped out before you knew what you were saying, since you had enough presence of mind to hide your own dirty little secret; thereby making Elizabeth look worse than you. Jason is no saint, nor is Elizabeth, but neither one of them has, or is likely EVER to spill YOUR dirty little secret, even though you betrayed both of them by blabbing to Nikolas. Jason could very easily tell Nikolas that he went a little nuts when he saw you buffing the floors with your step-daddy, but he won’t. Jason is nothing if not loyal, something you always claimed to be toward him. How FAST that loyalty disappears when you feel hurt or threatened. It’s probably a good thing that you didn’t blab your own dirty secret to him, because Nikolas would not have felt so sorry for you. In fact, Nikolas probably would have had Psycho-Nanny Colleen toss you out of his castle on your self-righteous ass and made sure you never got anywhere near Molly and Krystina again. He might even show some of his Cassadine colors by “dealing” with Ric. And if your relationship with Jason does go up in smoke, you have no one to blame but yourself. Look what happened to Robin when she betrayed Jason by telling AJ about Michael. Not quite the same situation, of course, but that involved a child too, and it wasn't just Jason you hurt by blabbing to Nikolas, you hurt Elizabeth - someone he cares about and feels responsible for, much to your chagrin. Jason doesn't take those things so lightly. First you gutted him by boffing Ric, a mortal enemy, thereby hurting yourself as much as him, but now you have gone and betrayed a confidence you swore to keep. How is your beloved supposed to trust you after that? All of that said, it’s time for you to be the grownup, independent woman you always claimed to be. The one who supposedly took care of herself for years before landing in Port Chuckles. Stop blaming everyone else for the decisions and mistakes you’ve made. Stop making Jason responsible for your happiness, or lack of it. Listen to your Mommy; underneath her compulsive, neurotic need to control things, she’s actually not so far off the mark. YOU need to have your own life. You need to know who you are before you can begin to know what you want out of life. You need to stop relying on men to take care of you so you don’t have to take care of yourself. You need to stop listening to Carly when she feeds your fears that Elizabeth wants to “steal” Jason away from you. You need to have an honest dialogue with your Mommy about boffing her husband, beg her forgiveness and move out of her house. Preferably, to someplace very far away from Port Charles.
I think I need a drink...
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