Thank Goodness it’s almost sweeps! I’m telling you, all of the ABC shows have dragged to painful points “building up” to the start of sweeps (Some more than others, as One Life to Live has been the best things on daytime in the last few months.). I use “building up to” as a term not because it is appropriate, but for a lack of better term to use. Remember when sweeps culminated a big story arc? We would find out the baby’s daddy was, or who killed whom, who was behind what villainy. We could count on getting some kind of satisfaction from the resolution of the story lines. The bitch’s schemes blew up in her face and she was exposed. The bad guy would be killed or captured. The heroine would finally win the day or the decent, honest fellow would win the girl or the bad girl would see the error of her ways. 

It isn’t like that any more. Now sweeps are short, contained stories that rarely start much before the sweeps period and often do not continue in any significant way after the end of the period. Granted, these are frequently some of the best times on the programs and as such, I look forward to them but they actually have little to do with the conditions of the shows before or after and that is very sad indeed. It is a strange commentary on daytime that they rely on three short three to four week sweeps periods to sustain a program that is on the air 52 weeks a year. When did it become the gimmick to stage good programming for 9 to 12 weeks a year and allow the other 38 to 42 weeks to rot?  

Take All My Children; it is a mess. Several major recasts that are not being well accepted, a few lack luster romances that have the excitability level of grass growing, a stalking situation where we like the stalker better than the abused victims, three people scandalizing for revenge, one deaf baby, a preemie who’s care went off the authenticity chart within two weeks of his birth, two spying for revenge, one pretending to be his disabled brother because he can’t stand to act like a normal human being and some old people who are more interesting in their 15 minutes a month than all the teens rolled in to one. Will some one wake me if ANYTHING worth watching happens? I’m at such a major loss with this program. Seriously for Tylenol PM and vodka martini I’d stop watching and have a nap instead. That said, I’m going to do the totally cheesy soap commentary cop out I like to call My Forum Round-Up” and just pray that sweeps brings some new inspiration! 

On the TV Fan Online Forums, Mollypop77 writes: “How can Levin Rambin as Lily have chemistry with everyone and their mama but Levin as Ava is a total cold fish??? Why am I intrigued by Richie and Lily? Not in a romantic sense and certainly not as a redeemer for Richie's nefarious and dastardly plans. But the scene where he said he didn't like to be touched and she asked if could have sex and he just looked flummoxed was cute. They almost remind me of Zily back in the day when Zach would talk to Lily but didn't really know what to make of her.

While I'm here can I just say that Richie was carved from awesome and dipped in greatness with a dash of sexy as hell??? I would never kick Richie out of bed. I don't think I would even get mad at him for leaving the wet towels on the floor! Hubba hubba BABY!” 

Our own Eye On Soaps MedioHo says: “I would have enjoyed the scene where Ryan shot Annie a lot more had it not been spoilered to death. To quote John Belushi, “But NOOOOOO!” Sometimes a little subtlety would be nice, along the lines of “Friday: Ryan accidentally shoots Annie. Blames RichieWes. RichieWes freaks out. Monday: RichieWes reaches out to Babe after seeing Ryan shoot Annie.” There ya go – some information, but not too much. Let those of us who are not fans of all things Lavery have a fleeting moment of hope: Annie gone, Ryan dropping the soap in state prison, RichieWes and Babe running away with Emma and Lil’ A, never to return. No, instead we get. “Quien es mas macho/psycho?” 

While BinkyMimo88 at ABC- All My Children Message Board thinks like I do: “She's a bad mother IMO, just for that fact that she sits there and talks to a deaf Spike about constant revenge schemes. He's lucky he can't hear at this point. Kendall is due for an imaginary friend. I cannot stand Kendall anymore. I want her off my show. ” 

Then we have the TV Fan Online Daytime Confidential PodCast, of which I am usually a part but have missed the last two weeks due to a rousing case of pneumonia and family obligations. This week Luke and Danielle interview Michael Bruno who dishes about season 5 of I Want To Be a Soap Star and its winner, Ashlee. You can listen to it from here or from The TV Fan Online site. They are talking about who Michael thinks are the rising young stars of daytime, One Life to Live’s resurgence as a daytime power house, Diva’s Diva Lynn Herring and where daytime might be headed. I’m not going to miss this one! Thanks to those of you who asked and yes I will be back on the podcasts next week. I’ve missed you, too. 

Moving on to One Life to Live, the current cream of the crop on daytime as far as I am concerned. So, Lindsay’s not a cumquat: good news! The bad news is she is going up for murdering slime ball Spencer. There had to be a better way to get Cat Hickland back in to the swing of things. Damn, she is good, too. The woman does more sitting in a chair reminiscent of the broom stick and wig that is currently playing Laura Spencer on General Hospital than some of these younger actresses. Not BethAnn Bonner, though, that girl really is a find. Brilliant idea to put her in the girlfriend dynamic of Leyla and Sarah.  It really brings out her inability to be a flighty girl and emphasizes her strong independent male-like personality. I think she is perfect. 

How I loathe Todd. I’m completely unhappy that the writers have devised a situation where he is “in the right." I feel for Marcie and the baby, I really do, but she is a felon. Kidnapping a child away from its biological parents is wrong whether you’re Carly & Jason, Carly & Sonny, Carly & Jax, Babe, Kelly & Paul or Marcie McBain. I’m just plain sick of them expecting me to champion one of the main characters breaking the law whatever ABC show it is on. Then you have this show, One Life to Live, that has made the most astounding comeback from the brink of suck-ta-tude I believe that I have EVER SEEN and yet it is still resorting to trite soap cliché’s like this. Please! One Life to Live is too good a show at this point to be tripped up on technicalities! 

While we have the stroke of genius that is bringing us Viki waiting tables and living in a motel, they also give us Sarah and Jared in a make out war with Natalie and Christian in the center of a nice restaurant. It might not suck completely if Natalie and Christian were not ex-spouses… No, never mind; it would still suck. We have Talia and her 'Tonio crush, Victor, Sean, Leyla who are all really adding up to a good time. I love Langston’s dilemma, the teens and Dorian’s involvement. No doubt Blair will have a hard time with Todd being so completely self centered that he would never in five billion years be all right with taking in a child who is not his own but if you take Todd out of the equation, I’m loving it. I guess you can see that I am really enjoying One Life to Live.  

General Hospital has me looking forward to sweeps as no other show does a sweeps stunt as well as General Hospital does. The show may suck giant goat “beboes” every other week of the year, but at least those 9 to 12 weeks will be watch able. There may be catastrophe of the month or death and destruction, but they are usually worth at least 20 minutes of the 50 that they air. I love when they do formal events where the whole cast makes an appearance. That’s just icing on the cake for me. 

I’m enjoying Robin without Patrick. He is a real pain in the ass though, isn’t he? He doesn’t want to be any where near Robin’s plans for parenthood but he is dedicating himself to ruining her chances to the best of his abilities. I’m glad they are broke up. I’d like to see Robin and Nik together. Speaking of Nik, how come when Sonny was obviously losing his mind, Emily jumped immediately to the mental illness diagnoses but Nik is manifesting some very disturbing symptoms and they do all the medical things first and haven’t even mentioned a mental health angle yet? It’s dumb. 

Lulu is an ignorant snatch, just like Carly was/is and I no longer give a flying rats ass anything about her or her ill-bred, ridiculous decisions and actions. I’m “thisclose” to hating her. Fortunately I can now confidently say that once hated is not always hated because I am really enjoying Sonny and Kate. It’s a first, I know. I absolutely LOVE Diane and everything she has been involved in. LOVE HER. I’m gratified that Liz and Lucky quit letting the litigators run their divorce, even though I really dug Alexis and Diane. Still sick to death of Lucky not knowing Jake is Jason’s kid though. How long can they drag it out? I’m sure I don’t want to know! 

Does anyone else feel like the new, young orderly is Toussaint only magically a young man again? Has fate given him another chance not to squander his gift on women? He is a looker, for sure. I like that they are focusing more on the hospital since Night Shift ended. I miss Cody and Lainey, but other than that I’m satisfied with the meshing of the two programs. To bad they won’t explain away Robin’s visions of herself, though. Maybe during sweeps? 

Anyway, I’ll catch you next week!

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