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...soaps in the key of life by Trish Fodor Werewolves of London I saw a
werewolf with a Chinese menu in his hand, Ah, Warren Zevon. Can’t tell you how sad I was when the man left this world. Fortunately for us, he left behind treasures like this song, which takes on particular significance during the Halloween season. Of course, there are a plethora of cool songs to commemorate All Hallow’s Eve. CCR’s Bad Moon Rising comes to mind so does the ridiculously overplayed Monster Mash as well as anything from the soundtrack of the cult classic, The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Now that would be an interesting show to cast with soap stars! If you’ve seen the film or stage show, I’ll leave you to contemplate who could play what role... In the spirit of Halloween, I’ve thinking about soaps’ scariest moments over the years. Admittedly, the story lines are sometimes frightening simply because they can be so bad but, in this case, I’m talking about hair-raising moments of fear or suspense.
GHThere was the time when Alan Quartermaine was a force to be reckoned with. When he suspected his wife Monica was having an affair with the dashing Dr. Rick Webber, Alan hatched a heinous plot for revenge. Armed with a gun, he headed to the beach house where the two were “doin’ the nasty” prepared to blow them both away. I remember being pretty creeped out by the sinister look on Stuart Damon’s face. It was beyond anger and literally gave me goosebumps. Another scene on GH that made me shift in my seat was when Anna Devane was kidnapped by the evil Grant Putnam. Being held captive was harrowing enough but even more so was being guarded by his razor toothed, saliva-dripping dog, Satan. The way the dog barred his teeth and growled at her just inches from her cell really scared me back then. In more recent years, my heart stopped when Ric Lansing stood over his (then) wife Elizabeth with a pillow poised to smother her in her hospital bed. It got to me more than his locking Carly in a panic room chained to a freakin’ wall. I was holding my breath the entire time, thinking “Is he really gonna do it?” Manny Ruiz was one scary dude as he prepared to stick a needle to Sam’s porcelain skin to tattoo a message to Jason. (I hated it when they let Robert LaSardo go. If they could bring him back and pair him with Anders Hove’s Cesar Faison, GH would have two of the baddest men on the planet to screw with Sonny and Jason and maybe actually win against them!) A girl can dream, right “sweetness”?
AMCPine Valley isn’t a particularly spooky place. (Well, maybe Erica without make-up but…) However, it has given us a fair share of suspense over the years. Some moments that stick out to me include Anna’s “shooting” in 2001. Hired by Charlotte Devane to murder Anna, Ilene Pringle put the back of a brunette’s head squarely in her crosshairs and pulled the trigger. Fade to black. When the story resumed the next day viewers were shocked to see that Gillian Andrassy Lavery was the victim instead in a tragic case of mistaken identity. I must have watched it right, no spoilers or previews. When Ryan came up the parapet to wake what he thought was a sleeping Gillian and put his hand under head, then recoiled, raising the wet, sticky palm smeared with blood, I gasped. Nooooo! AMC really got me with that one! We all knew it was coming but Leo’s fall to his drowning death was another heart stopping moment. Hanging over the raging river, my heart fell right along with him as he plunged into the water below. There was a glimmer of hope as he clung to a log as a horrified Greenlee looked on. But the current was swift and his energy waning. I sobbed as one-by-one, his fingers started to let go and he slowly went under. Not scary in the “Boo!” sense but they milked every ounce of suspense that they could out of that scene. Bianca’s rape by Michael Cambias was jaw dropping. It was not only frightening to watch her helplessly trying to escape the living room at Myrtle Fargate’s boarding house but the image of her terrified face pressed against the window haunts me to this day. And later, what a grizzly discovery? Michael Cambias paid dearly for his crime when the devil turned Popsicle was discovered hanging from a meat hook in a walk-in freezer. Very goulish, indeed!
OLTLNot knocking Kale Brown, but I wasn’t a huge fan of Sam Rappaport until Lawrence Lau assumed the role. I loved him as Greg on All My Children and here he was, all grown up now and in Llanview. That is, until his lifeless body was discovered stretched out on his bed with ex wife Lindsay holding the smoking gun. She was out to kill Troy McIver but whoops! Wrong guy. The fear in her doe eyes was palpable as she turned the body over to discover one big boo boo. It must suck to be a Rappaport because next it was Jen’s turn to bite the dust courtesy of her boyfriend Riley’s psychodaddy, Daniel Coulson. A prime suspect for Paul Cramer’s murder, Jen caught the corrupt DA red handed planting evidence against her in her car. Eyes wide with fear, she tried to make a run for it. It was a real horror flick moment when Jen ended up with a bag on her head and then dumped in the trunk. Be careful whom you romance, especially if it’s for cunning means. Todd Manning learned that the hard way by making false overtures to Buchanan accountant, and one odd number, Margaret Cochran (Cheesy, but I couldn’t resist!). Margaret had all the right ingredients to be a resident psycho: an obsessive personality, capable of murder and a dash of Kathy Bates a la Misery. Of course, she gave Llanview some it’s most suspenseful moments including locking Blair in the trunk of a car in a demolition yard. I cringed as the car was next to be flattened under the tonnage of a crusher. She topped that with kidnapping and then raping Todd, which was twisted enough to make me shudder. Of course, the ABC soap that celebrated the Halloween spirit on a daily basis is now defunct. Port Charles showed us the supernatural sector of the Upstate New York harbor town with vampires running amuck everywhere! Gee, I wonder where they all went? Port Chuckles seems to be monster free these days. But let your mind wander a bit. What if the bloodsuckers returned? Sonny could be Count Mobula and could you just see Michael as Eddie Munster? Jason could be Frankenstein (he wouldn’t have to change expressions and grunt now and then, no different!) Instead of all the women in town calling each other bitches they would be witches. As for Ric? I could see him with fangs hanging upside down in the DA’s office. At least that would explain his recent return to the dark side. And what about Luke as the Wolf Man? It wouldn’t be the first time Spencer was known to howl at the moon! Until next time, kick back, pop in a good CD and enjoy the music! Well, I saw
Lon Chaney walking with the Queen, Trish :)
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