May 21, 2008
Party of one? Right
this way please. For dessert, we’re offering a classic that’s been revamped
a bit, called Betrayal Soufflé. It’s made with bittersweet chocolate, egg
whites, and Godiva liquor. All it takes is one bite for the whole thing to
collapse in on itself. I hear Kate Howard’s been seen nibbling on one
recently.
Poor, poor naïve Kate.
She’s still trying to speak to Sonny logically about her motivations and how
revenge on others won’t solve anything. Sadly, she does not realize that
logic has never been Sonny’s strong suit. He much prefers lashing out in
anger—it’s easier to act on than reasoned reaction. I hope she has a heart
to heart with herself soon and grasps how being Sonny’s woman has cost her
more than a million dollars. Every one of his flings eventually sees the
hard cold facts of his life. I would have thought a bullet to the chest was
warning enough for a smart girl like Kate but I guess I was wrong.
Yes, ladies and
gentleman, the writers actually had Mac utter the term ‘preemptive strike.’
What I learned this week
from General Hospital: Old people (you know, anyone over 45) can only have
fun if they are stone drunk. If they can’t bury their sorrows in liquor or
nonstop adventure, then they become destitute and pathetic. And also, they
are all scared of being grandparents, likely because they’ve previously
abandoned their own children. I guess I should rethink my trip to find that
Aztec princess now. If I go, I’m probably only cursing myself with liver
damage a decade and a half from now.
I am completely sick of
Claudia. She had some potential but, well, she’s a mobster. Anything
interesting about those types usually fizzles within a month of their
introduction. See Lansing, Trevor for an example. It doesn’t help that the
woman is onscreen every second of the day. She reminds me of a bee just
buzzing around even though no one wants to give her any pollen. I
especially thought her rant to Kate about how supposedly inappropriate it
was to support Sonny and see Michael was ridiculous. You want to talk
inappropriate Claudia? How about visiting the kid that you got shot the
same day it happened? At least Kate has ties to the family and you know,
didn’t try and kill his father.
The demise of Dr. Death
made me quite sad. I’d have preferred that he simply disappeared, lurking
always in the shadows of Port Charles like Helena and Cesar Faison. He
could have returned someday to spike Sonny’s lithium.
There were a few moments
that choked me up emotionally this week. No tears but I did feel for the
characters. Specifically, when Morgan kept repeating, “Wake up, Michael,
wake up,” and when Sonny asked Mike to come with him to check out the
long-term care facility. However, any empathy will fade quickly if no
substantial turn from mob life occurs. Which of course means my empathy
will fade quickly.
So Diane can publicly
proclaim that Jerry was the one who blew up the MetroCourt yet no one still
turns him in? I don’t understand why that man is walking around town with
no fear. Emily was his blackmail trump card and she’s been out of the
picture for awhile now. What’s holding people back now?
What is this “Carly has
strong/great instincts” line we keep being fed? I think Georgie said it
first during the Black and White Ball, when by the way, her instincts were
proven wrong as she thought Cooper was the Text Message Killer (cue
villainous music). Is this supposed to be a compliment of some sort? I’m
not sure I’ve ever seen Carly’s instincts prove correct. Anyone?
Johnny and Lulu may have
been dusted with some magical chemistry powder while I wasn’t looking.
Being as I’ve hardly been able to sit through Lulu scenes for months now,
that’s entirely possible. I did see some sparks during their various
liplocks and I wouldn’t mind seeing more.
Why on earth did they
SORAS Spencer?
Let’s pause for a moment
to reflect on the absurdity of Ric “I’ve got a pregnant woman locked up in
my panic room” Lansing being the least insane of the psychos running around
town. Perhaps he invited Jerry and Anthony to Port Charles just so he would
look better by comparison.
Times ‘Bitch’ was used
by a character since my last column: 3. What, only 3? You all were as
surprised as I was as no one came close to guessing such a low number. If
you add-in ‘whore,’ though, then either word was uttered on seven
occasions, making Lindsay31 the winner! I think I will count both words in
my ongoing tally because really, either’s as offensive as the other when
used with such regularity.
Next week we are
offering a special fondue menu, perfect for trying out new or old sauces you
haven’t *ahem* dipped into for awhile. Just cook those sirloin slices in
hot oil for 5 minutes then try out whichever sauce you’d prefer. Will the
new flavors be as tempting as your old delights by the time you’ve taken
that last bite?
The Gourmez
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