|
May 1, 2008 AMC Whatever the opposite of closure is, that’s what everybody got when Jesse’s grave was opened. A torn-apart stuffed elephant? As it turned out, it was the last thing Jesse had bought for young Frankie, and Angie secretly swapped it for another one when she saw Frankie was going to put it in his father’s coffin. (When did she have the time to go to Toys R Us?) Anyway, the original eventually ended up in a box of Cassandra’s things that were then donated to charity. End of the road for Dumbo? Hardly. Cassandra apparently was very attached to the plush pachyderm, and has it with her in Paris. Coincidentally, she’s taking the red-eye from the City of Lights to the Valley of Pines, and is bringing Dumbo with her. Whatever’s in there must not be detectable by airport security. The way Uncle Rob’s been fixated on it for 20 years, it must be the big sister of GH’s Ice Princess – the Ice Queen! Wouldn’t it be true to form if the little hints Annie’s been dropping about the non-existent burglar – “oh, I hope it wasn’t Richie” – came back to bite her in the ass? Maybe Ryan and the rest of us will finally meet the “real” Annie. My gosh, it’s Josh! It appears that Cambias is involved in a certain medical mission in Africa. Interesting, especially for Aidan, who’s been tasked with heading a commando raid to rescue the kidnapped doctor. Finally, a chance to really use his Special Ops training. Oh, and look at the helmet Zach’s designed for him, with a big red and white target painted on it! Jackson actually gave Greenlee a blank check to pay for her wedding arrangements. Doesn’t he know his daughter better than that? She could bankrupt the guy! Someone’s playing tricks on Adam, removing buttons from his shirts, smashing barware, and, somehow, making the melodious strains of “You Are My Sunshine” waft through the air. Remind you of someone in particular? Someone who might have several bones to pick with Adam…even from beyond the grave? Did you notice that one of Trey’s ugly white lamps lives on in Cassandra’s room? I thought Kendall took them all to her condo, but maybe they multiply, just like the number of bedrooms in that apartment. Erica’s getting so stir-crazy in solitary confinement that she’s befriended a ladybug she named Gwendolyn. She became very upset when Gwendolyn flew away home. What’s next, an homage to The Birdman of Alcatraz? Angie wants what she and Jesse never had: a real wedding. Maybe they should piggyback onto Jackson’s largesse and make it a double with Greenlee and Aidan! Carmen called Jackson MontYummy and told him how Erica had been thrown into solitary after her meeting with the warden. He was concerned for her mental state, and for good reason. He knows her as well as anyone else, and senses that she’s in trouble. (Oh, look, there’s her “14th Birthday” cake from daddy!) Annie, you trouble-making little minx! Leaking the poie dancing video to get Ryan’s attention…she really IS the twisted sister! Greenlee can’t understand why Zach is sending Aidan on a dangerous rescue mission in Sudan. She thinks there’s a lot more to the story. She would be right. Finally, she convinced Zach that Aidan belonged with her, and played the guilt card so he would pull Aidan off the case. Grudgingly, Zach complied. Wasn’t it cool when Erica hallucinated the wedding rings of her ten husbands and their voices came back to haunt her? Jack had better talk the warden out of keeping her in solitary pronto for sanity’s sake, but in the meantime, it’s kinda fun. Lovely, too, to hear Mona’s voice saying “three generations of strong Kane women,” and reassuring Erica that she’ll always love her. *sniff* “Action Jackson,” Carmen’s latest nickname for Jack, met with the warden and correctly surmised that she was jealous of Erica’s higher profile. His time with Erica has made him a guy who reads women better than most, with keen insight, although it doesn’t always work with the complex Ms. Kane. Zach actually did try to take Aidan off the Sudanese rescue, but Aidan found out who the hostage is, and refused to abort the mission. Jinkies, it’s Jake! CASTING NEWS Ambyr “Colby” Childers has been cast off so the character can be aged, which will make her budding relationship with Frankie more palatable, I suppose. Too bad, because Childers had been growing on me these last few months, making the transition from spoiled brat to caring young lady. Best of luck to you, Ambyr. The third adult version of Dr. Jake Martin will now be played by daytime veteran Ricky Paull Goldin (fourth version, if you count young med student Joey, my favorite incarnation of Tad’s younger brother). Dr. Jake’s cut quite a swath through the women of Pine Valley – Mia, Greenlee, Liza, crazy Dr. Allie, Gillian – which, in effect, means he’s also slept with Aidan, Ryan, Adam, Scott (Stuart’s son), Leo and Tad, keeping in mind that when you sleep with someone, you supposedly are sleeping with all of their previous sexual partners. Though we haven’t seen Leven “Lily/Ava” Rambin onscreen in eons, that doesn’t mean the actress hasn’t been busy. Website Gawker.com reports that she’s been all over the place, in fact. I’m going to quote verbatim from the posting about Rambin while reminding her fans that these are not my words, but I think they bear repeating, as this young talent is not someone we want to see taking the Lohan/Dunst/Spears path: “Every Night is a Wild Night for Jailbait Actress Lev Rambin It seems like it might be fun to be blonde 17-year-old actress and alleged “It Girl” Leven Rambin, the kid sister of Julia Allison sidekick Mary Rambin. Acting roles on All My Children and filming something for the CW aside, it seems her career as a writer is heating up: first a column in Page Six magazine, and then guest-blogging on LOLA! ‘When the wonderful, amazing, breathtaking, creative, eccentric [artist] Mr. Emmett Shine asked to be a guest writer on his LOLA blog, my initial reaction was “Oh My GOD, blogs are the devil!!’ You know what’s the devil? Jailbait actresses who refer to themselves as ‘Levlita,’ even in jest. In a post titled ‘justkiddingjustkidding’ and tagged ‘omg that’s sooo la,’ little Lev blogs…” Those of you who want to read the blog can find it at Gawker.com by searching Fameballs/Jailbait/Leven Rambin. Suffice it to say that her behavior is a bit worrisome, and I’d like to see her back on the right track, as I’m sure many of you agree. Perhaps a return to AMC is precisely what she needs to keep her grounded. Perhaps a letter writing campaign to TPTB is in order. Just sayin’. GH Lots of action in the Chuckles. Dr. Evil tried to blow out of town, but was foiled by a suddenly ill Spinelli, complicated further by the presence of Maxie, Mac and Jerry. Lulu saw Johnny shoot Sonny, also unsuccessfully. Robin caught Patrick describing her mother to Coleman as a gorgeous cross between Lara Croft and Emma Peel, and a gunman with lots of ammo has ambushed Jason and Claudia. It’s a hot time in the old town tonight! Maxie’s finally gotten the proper Spinelli moniker: Maxinista. I approve! And those two wacky kids managed to stab Dr. Evil with a sedative-filled syringe. Most excellent! Diane keeps complimenting Max on his flexibility, so much so that it looks like they’ll be breaking Sonny’s new rule about no sex between employees. Too bad he didn’t have that rule in effect when Alexis was his lawyer (or Reese his FBI liaison). Why on earth would Spinelli and Maxinista think they could get Dr. Evil on a gurney past Epiphany and the rest of the Nurses’ Station gang? Is Spinelli smoking reefer again? Action at the Haunted Star! A gambler’s paradise, especially for Sam, who appears to be having fun with Lucky for a change. Added bonus: Tracy’s there to keep an eye on things. Unfortunately, so is Alexis, and she showed up with Mac and Harper and ordered the place shut down. Why? She believes there’s mob money laundering going on. Mac ordered Luke to open up his books and everyone else was asked to leave. Rut-ro. LINE OF THE WEEK: “I speak Spinelli a hell of a lot better than you do.” It must be hard for Lulu to see Maxinista captivate first Johnny, then the Jackal. Catfight? Dr. Evil confessed to Kate that he shot Michael. Does he have a death wish or did Maxinista shoot him up with more than a sedative? No, he thinks Kate is so desperate not to see Sonny retaliate that she’ll give him a million dollars to go away. She agreed. (Did he already spend Nik’s $10 million on hookers?) Wow. The Ditzy Don double-crossed Ric and retained Trevor to plead his case in court alongside his son. Ric correctly figured out that Anthony planned to pit the two of them against each other for the role of consigliere. Last man standing? On the other side, Diane has offered to assist Alexis in court. This could be good, especially with Spinelli unexpectedly joining the team of righteousness! Sam offered to shill for the Haunted Star, and Luke agreed, provided that all her assets are on display. Tracy was not amused, given Sam’s dicey career path and considerable natural assets. Speaking of Sam, she’s complaining that hydrocodone does less for her pain than acetaminophen. Who’s prescribing her meds these days, the same person who is deliberately screwing up the meds of Liz’s patients? Is someone being gaslighted? Who would want to do that to poor Elizabeth? LINE OF THE WEEK 2: “Tracy, I love you.” More than her bank account and Cook’s blueberry pancakes (though he didn’t mention Edward’s prize hooch). No matter, Luke truly does love his wife. Yay!
|
