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June 13, 2007 AMC When Amanda finds out that JR’s kidnapping was bogus – and she will – I hope she summons up all her mother’s DNA and opens up the biggest can of whoop-ass ever. Throw him down a well! Do it for momma! Well, as Rebecca Budig (original Greenlee) reportedly feared, they’re doing some major character assassination on Greens. Trying to get custody of Spike proved it. Wouldn’t it be neat if Mary Smythe showed up (actually, that alone would be great) and said, “Oh, Greenlee, darling. It slipped my mind, but Jackson and I had another tryst after you were born and…well…Annie is your biological sister. I hid her away all these years. Champagne for all!” It sure would explain a few things, create more friction, a catfight or two between Mary and Erica, and it might even make Annie interesting. How strange. Jamie’s not ready to be a “full-on” dad with Julia, but a few years ago, when he and Babe kidnapped Lil’ A, he certainly felt otherwise. What’s up with that? Wasn’t it cute when Lily felt the need to define “Juvie” for Ava? I think big sis is well acquainted with the term! Hooray! Greenlee and Kendall teamed up to save Fusion! KWAK’s hired a hot medical student, Kyle, to work for her this summer! Erica wants to meet the man who offered to donate $1 million to the Miranda Center when her divorce is final (wouldn’t it be fun if it were Evil Daddy Cambias?)! Which scenario will implode first? Is anyone from AMC going to take home a Daytime Emmy Friday night? If anyone does, I can confidently predict it will be Leven “Lily/Ava” Rambin. After all, that was AMC’s only acting nod. It received four technical/styling nominations. Strangely, no nomination for its writing team. How bizarre. SIX DEGREES OF RESCUE ME/AMC Last season’s Rescue Me had Alexa “Babe” Havins guest as a motormouth nympho, who snags Tommy Gavin for a night and gets her mouth duct-taped shut to quiet her blabbering. This season, Jennifer Esposito guests as a volunteer firefighter who actually saved Tommy from psycho Sheila’s burning house. Who is Esposito, and what’s her connection to AMC? She’s a great actress who happened to have been once engaged to Cameron “Ryan” Matheson. I suppose that’s two degrees of separation. GH Kate doesn’t much care for Carly’s choice of a replacement statue. Personally, it’s not my style, but Michael and Morgan could fit into it rather nicely, outfitted with koi spears and other ways to commit general mayhem. It’s wonderful to see Stan again, but what happened to his cute little dreads? Was Kiko “Stan” Ellsworth off making yet another remake of Shaft? Bring back the dreads, STAT! Speaking of people it’s wonderful to see, here’s Coleman! Kinda hard to see him underneath all that foliage. Was Blake “Coleman” Gibbons off making yet another remake of Grizzly Adams? Bring out the straight razor, STAT! (Can’t you just imagine a manly dude like Coleman using a straight razor, clad in only a towel? I certainly can! Time to hit the cold shower!) Oh, no, another Doctor Girls Gone Wild on Tequila night. I really don’t want to share their collective hangover. Let’s hope this is a one-shot-and-we’re-off-to-pick-up-interns kind of evening. Please. Denied. At least we got a smidge of background on Stan’s childhood and a toast to Mac, a great father who actually doesn’t have children of his own (sound familiar?) How many times is Sonny going to mention Kate’s aversion to running away? Decide already – was there a love child born to this Bensonhurst native or not? Enough, already! Okay, one thing about Patrick and Robin: shouldn’t he be reaching for a condom to prevent the possibility of H.I.V. infection? I would think fear of pregnancy would be the lesser of the reasons for wrapping that rascal. There, I’m done. Amelia, you big blabbermouth. First Sonny, now Jason. Jason had no clue that Sam knew Jake is his child (no surprise, honestly). It’s really not nice to screw with someone’s head when they’re unfortunately incarcerated. Bitch! She even used the “we only get one father” card, in a not so subtle way to get him to dump Sam and claim Elizabeth and Jake. LINE OF THE WEEK: “Oh, please, Scott Baldwin can’t even manage his own hair.” Good one, Tracy! Amelia’s lurking outside Lucky and Liz’s house, staring at the baby. Gee, what better way to destroy Sam both personally and professionally than by kidnapping a baby and pinning it on the hapless Ms. McCall? Tomorrow night brings the Daytime Emmy Awards, and GH is nominated for nine, though no chance for an “Outstanding Daytime Drama” three-peat, as they missed that category this year. The show was nominated for casting (the marvelous Mark Teschner), makeup, directing team, and (choke) writing. Let’s not forget the acting nods: Tony Geary (Best Actor), Genie Francis and Rebecca Herbst (Best Actress), Rick Hearst (Best Supporting Actor), and Julie Berman (Best Younger Actress). I’ll root for them all, but Geary, Francis and Berman in particular. If Genie “Laura” Francis won, wouldn’t that be a big pie in the face to TPTB? Well deserved, on all fronts! You know, I don’t watch OLTL, but I’ve been seeing its “Prom Night” promos, and I’m impressed. Wouldn’t it be terrific if GH did something like that? Oh, snap, that’s right – they used to do a wonderful Nurses’ Ball every year. My bad. |