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July 18, 2007 --The Media Ho is heading to New Orleans for a bit of R&R (that would be Rockin’ and Rollin’!), but has left you with various new confessions and observations about AMC, GH, and GH: Night Shift episodes from last week and the week so far. See you with a regular column next week…until then, lessez les bon temps roulez! AMC It appears that the caterpillar on Jon Boy’s upper lip crawled off while he was boinking Ava. Thank goodness. Let’s hope it was crushed by her cleavage and will never appear on the show again. So lovely to see Ruth Martin, even if just for a day. I adored Lee “Ruth” Meriwether back when she played Catwoman on Batman, a much-loved show from my childhood. There were those who preferred Julie Newmar or Eartha Kitt in the role, but Lee was my fave feline. There must be a new law in Pine Valley: all men must wear their shorts at least six inches below the navel. Any complaints? Not from me, as long as the buff guys are on camera! It’s also nice to see Marian, but puzzling that she doesn’t interact much with namesake grandchild Colby. Does Jennifer “Marian” Bassey have the same grandmother clause as Susan Lucci? Doubtful! Jonathan making love to Ava as Lily totally creeped me out. I would have been far happier if he’d gone limp. Loved it when the Fusion girls vamped to “Ain’t No Mountain High Enough.” Then again, I’m a sucker for that song. It was great when the ladies of Designing Women did it at the talent show and when Susan Sarandon and kiddies did it in Stepmom. Greenlee was behind the million-dollar donation to the Miranda Center that would be made when Erica and Jack’s divorce becomes final? Think Jack will cut her some slack? Male triplets are now playing Spike. It’s about time he lost that girly hair. What – or who – was Ava using as a cue stick on The Comeback’s pool table? GH Lending credence to my theory that a 14-year-old Epiphany hooked up with Eli Love was her reaction when he tried to leave the hospital: “I’ve seen it before.” YOWZA! Regarding Jerry’s little patches of facial hair – can’t they find him a razor that works? Just like the Logan/Maxie sex bet, Patrick’s fight to operate on a non-insured patient seems awfully familiar, albeit a much more recent rip-off. Recycling much? Georgie wants to spend her junior year at the Sorbonne in Paris. Will someone come along to change her mind (Spinelli, anybody?), or is this the start of her exit? Anna’s back, and in a rather cute way, rappelling into Patrick’s apartment. Her crush on Eli Love is also kinda cute. Then there was the reference to AMC’s Alex Devane (“everybody has a twin somewhere, I happen to have one myself”). The writers truly raised the bar for Finola “Anna” Hughes. Most delicious so far: her interaction with Eli and Noah, especially her efforts to turn Noah into a rock star. So many priceless moments, so little time (because we know Hughes isn’t sticking around long enough to satisfy her legion of fans). LINE OF THE WEEK: “Are you doing them both? It wouldn’t be the first time.” Carly to Jerry upon finding him in a clinch with Sam (referring, of course, to Sam and Alexis). Good one! Sam should remind Carly that they not only have both been done by Sonny, but also by Jax – and that Sam had Jax first. The baby cast as Jake has the most gorgeous smile. Even my icy heart melts a bit when he flashes his gums! Never mind the pit bosses and hit men – I’m wondering how Alexis skirted past the issue of Kristina’s paternity: you know, the part about how Alexis and Sonny were never married. Places like the Winston Academy tend to frown on that sort of thing. GH:NS “If you guys are going to start working the night shift, you’re going to see things that are ten times crazier than this.” Nurse Epiphany Johnson to student nurses Jolene and Regina. Truer words were never spoken! Opening with a couple of bangs (first was a steamy shower scene starring Patrick and Robin, then an exploding ambulance), the action moved quickly from the locker room to the nurses’ station and then out to the parking lot. The guest credits included Alla Korat (who once played deranged Dr. Allie Doyle on AMC) and Pat Crawford Brown (a nosy neighbor on Desperate Housewives). Oh, “and” Steve Burton got special billing, as did Billy Dee “Toussaint Dubois” Williams. But I digress. The opening montage of the regular cast was more exciting than much of what’s been going on in Port Charles during the day, and then came the clever episode title, “frayed anatomies.” (Three guesses as to which ABC Prime Time smash hit they’re aping, and the first two don’t count.) The pacing is snappy and the dialogue isn’t half bad (especially when you consider credit is given to GH head writer Bob Guza and Elizabeth Korte, who writes much of the daytime dialogue). Spinelli ended up shooting himself in the foot, which brought him to the ER and his “angel of mercy,” student nurse Jolene. (Remember, Bradford “Spinelli” Anderson told me that GH:NS was in a “parallel universe” to GH. At night, Spinelli lusts for Jolene, but on GH, his heart still belongs to Lulu. Incidentally, if you missed my interview with Anderson, go to my Archives and click on July 8. It’s a fun read.) Dr. Julian, who we met recently on GH, is supposed to evoke some guy on Lost, which I don’t watch, so there you go. He’s played by Dominic Rains, and is supposed to be a major hottie and a major cardiologist. Sparks with Maxie? It’s sort of surreal to see Billy Dee Williams, such a major movie star (as in Star Wars’ The Empire Strikes Back, playing Lando Calrissian), standing around with a mop and a smile. This janitor’s got secrets. I half expect the mop to morph into a light saber. Alla Korat is playing Stacey Sloan, an HIV+ pregnant woman whom Robin tended to, which may eventually lead to Robin’s own HIV+ pregnancy story. No word yet on whether Stacey will be a recurring character. It’s never a pleasure to see overbearing hospital bean-cruncher Miss Sneed, but it served her right to walk in on Coop doing a handcuffed Maxie in a supply closet. Classic! Made even better when Mac came upon the scene! Wasn’t it cute when Robin tenderly bandaged Jason’s massive paws? Speaking of Jason, he took the rap for Spinelli’s injury to save The Jackal from some mandatory jail time. It looks like he’ll be sharing mops with Toussaint Dubois as part of his community service sentence. Gotta be better than Pentonville! Hmmm. Mystery toe-tag woman hails from Rome. Not Rome, NY but Rome, Italy. Her last name appears to be Barrett. She also appears to be alive. Now who could that possibly be? My verdict? I think the Night Shift is going to work out fine.
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