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October 4, 2007 AMC Oh, great. Babe’s going to take care of Emma. Won’t it be fun for Emma to meet Uncle Richie (Wes)? Won’t Annie be pleased? Wes/Richie appeared delighted, and planned to take Babe, Lil’ A and Emma on a picnic. Make that the picnic from hell. Tapping into Greenlee’s computer and composing a journal of love notes from Greenlee to Spike is a new low, even for Kendall. When Kendall was first introduced (and originated by Sarah Michelle Gellar), she was pure evil. She eventually matured, but has had her share of “brat attacks” since being brought back to town in the form of Alicia Minshew. We’re now getting a glimpse of the old Kendall. Well, most moms get fierce when their kids are threatened, and Kendall is obviously no exception. Just a bit over the top. Face it, when Erica thinks your revenge plot is going too far, you’d better rethink things! I nearly fell off the couch when Tad, after hearing KWAK wax rhapsodic about her wonderful bartender, saw Adam and said, “Look out, here’s the Anti-Wes.” Classic! Didn’t Greenlee speak for many of us when she wondered out loud if Yawnathan ever called Ava “Lily?” I’m really amazed that Adam knows what CBGBs is/was. Does he have a secret punk rock life we don’t know about? Did he hang out with Andy Warhol, Ultra Violet, The Velvet Underground and The Ramones? That would be cool, no? Yep, when Erica recommends family bonding over revenge, you know she’s concerned to the nth degree. If she thinks Kendall’s plot is dangerous, it’s time to heed the voice of experience. It almost sounds as if she’s channeling Mona! Where’s Barbara? In the Martin attic? Does Zach actually have some of Greenlee’s fertilized eggs? If so, wouldn’t she still need a surrogate to carry them? Also, would the desire to have a child that is biologically hers supercede the fact that Ryan would technically be the father, or would that make the concept more appealing? Greenlee claims to be over Ryan, but this could certainly change things. However, let me make one thing clear: Zach is putting this into motion with the intent to leave Greenlee with nothing. I’m getting tired of everyone pissing all over the girl. Enough, already! ‘Dre is laying so low you’d almost think he was Annie’s brother. Why so secretive? I’m still convinced it’s related to 9/11. GH Ooh, this is good. Lucky objects to Diane handling the divorce because she’s Sonny and Jason’s lawyer, yet sees nothing wrong with Alexis, the mother of his mistress du jour? It’s nice to see Liz match him insult for insult, but she has the advantage, dealing with a half-wit. After watching Diane unleash her wrath on Trevor after he announced that he’d had Kate fired from the magazine, I almost thought she had a girl-crush on Kate. What fury! It appears that Maxie went to local salon and got a knock-off of Kate’s hairdo. It actually looks pretty good on her. That was fun when Nikolas got all medieval on Lucky’s ass. What would be more fun? If Nik blurted out Jake’s true parentage during one of his impromptu meltdowns. I think I see some great catfight potential between Alexis and Diane. Wouldn’t it be cool if they had a major smackdown in court? Who was called a pig more often this week, Trevor or Logan? Whoopsie. The Jackal tapped into Crazy Johnny (The Scion of Evil) Zacchara’s text messages and saw the exchange between him and The Valkyrie. The Valkyrie should consider herself very fortunate…The Jackal’s got her back! Epiphany read The Snippy One (one of my names for Robin) after she got all critical of fellow staff members, including the formidable Nurse Johnson herself. You go, girl! The Piphster, as always, rocks! LINE OF THE WEEK: “Shut up, you skanky ‘ho!” Go, Lulu! Go, Lulu! Wait, there’s more: “Then again, you are the baby-faking, pill-stealing tramp of Port Charles.” The scene between Tracy, Carly and Alan the Ghost gave us several more lines worthy of LINE OF THE WEEK status: Carly: “What better family than a controlling shrew, a greedy old man, an overworked, grieving doctor, and let’s not forget the mud wrestling maid! That’ll straighten Lulu right out.” Tracy (gesturing at Alan, then covering by pretending to fan herself): “Don’t look at me like that. It’s just a hot flash. Just you wait.” Carly: “I don’t care if you see dead people, I want you out of here.” Wouldn’t one of Jax’s many guards have followed The Valkyrie to her meeting with The Warped One/Scion of Evil? And again, I ask: SINCE WHEN DOES CARLY DRIVE? Wasn’t it just last year that she refused Jax’s gift of a sweet classic Chevy for that very reason? Hello? Continuity? It’s official: Scotty is Logan’s dad. Do you see any bonding ahead of them? Me neither. It would be nice if Logan got a smart lawyer like Alexis to go after Scotty for his back child support obligation to Logan’s mom. After all, she slaved at multiple jobs to support herself and their son. She deserves some payback. Nice to see some hot, passionate sex between Sonny and Kate. She really gets his mojo working! Where’s Lorenzo’s body? Why is Ted “Lorenzo” King still doing fan events? Remember when TPTB had everyone convinced that Trevor “Todd” St. John had left OLTL because his character was being put to death? Is history repeating itself? We’ve been lied to before. The Warped One has The Valkyrie in his clutches. Not good. Jax, having talked to Spinelli, showed up, and met Johnny and his goons. Speaking of goons, again I ask: where are the ones supposedly protecting Jax, Carly and the boys? Someone’s going to have to do some ‘splaining to Sonny, that’s for sure. Look at Scotty, trying to make nice with Logan! Bringing up grandparents Lee and Gail, his sisters Karen and Serena (Karen, being dead, won’t be meeting her brother, but maybe Serena will). What a reversal! RANDOM CONFESSIONS Thirty lashes with a wet noodle for The Media Ho, who told you last week that DOOL’s Deidre Hall played Dyna Girl in Electra Woman and Dyna Girl. Hall played Electra Woman, Judy Strangis (most memorable for guesting on various TV shows through the 70s and 80s ) was Dyna Girl. Sorry about that! Thanks to the astute reader who clued me in! Dancing With The Stars: The Results Show polled members of the audience Tuesday night regarding the performances, and there were Rebecca (ex-Greenlee, AMC) and hubby “Bachelor Bob” (the king of ABC Daytime interstitials) Guiney. Most interesting was that they were commenting on Jennie “Beverly Hills 90210” Garth’s dance, rather than Budig’s former castmate, Cameron “Ryan” Mathison. Mathison, by the way, showed improvement over the first week, but Judge Bruno told him that he “looked like Superman but sometimes danced like Clark Kent!” No matter, if he continues to wear form fitting, low cut outfits (not unlike Edyta, his professional dance partner), his fan base will save him for at least a few more weeks.
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