May 15, 2006

What The??? 

UFTA!  OY!  Or whatever other exasperated sound one might make when feeling confused, frustrated, annoyed, ridden with angst and trepidation.  Regardless, that’s how I’m feeling right now.   

Typically this feeling focuses on one soap at a time but in the last few days it’s become all three.  I know I’m supposed to suspend reality and simply enjoy but let’s face it to some degree we become involved (some more than others) with the storylines and the characters and when they do or don’t do something that baffles us, we can’t get it.  Isn’t there something to be said for being true to the show and true to the character?  

Let’s start with AMC.  I’ve started watching the show more again (though I still tend to fast forward through some parts) and generally speaking, it’s enjoyable.  I’m happy Zach and Kendall are together again though I felt she gave in just a bit too soon for the likes of Kendall.  Maybe it’s hormones.  Anything can be contributed to those, right?  I still unfortunately fast forward through Aidan and Erin but only because they’re so

B - O - R - I - N - G!  How can someone as hot as Aidan have such a boring storyline over and over and over?  Women love this guy, give him something exciting and enjoyable for us to watch! He’s far better than Ryan in my book. When they do, I promise to watch.  

I really like how the Dixie story has begun to focus around JR and not Tad.  I’ve been down the Tad and Dixie road one too many times and frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn.  Do I really like Di and Tad?  Maybe.  I think I did before but lately she’s becoming such a weakling my tolerance has lessened.  Simone is lonely. Give her and Tad another chance.  They had some decent chemistry.  Wait.  Is Simone even around anymore?  Ethan’s dead and she’s been on what?  Maybe five times total? What a waste.  

What really gets my goat on AMC lately is Babe.  I like Babe.  I may be one of the chosen few in that category, but I can’t help it.  She’s tough and caring at the same time.  But come on, we’ve all got our limits.  She KNOWS her husband tried to off her yet instead of taking aim, she’s supporting him and wants to help him.  Is this love or co-dependency? I’m not sure but what I am sure of is I don’t like it.  Babe is loyal to those she loves, yes and maybe I’m supposed to believe she loves this man enough to totally forgive everything he’s done to her in the past and love him enough to stay with him after he’s tried to drop a load of bricks on her head.  But I don’t think I’m quite there.  Maybe it’s my inability to trust once I’ve been scorned but I just don’t see Babe having reached that unconditional level of love with JR quite yet.  Then again, this is a soap and I really shouldn’t expect things to go the way I expect them to, should I?  

I haven’t watched a whole lot of OLTL.  I’ve even tried to write about the show but all that comes out is my absolute frustration and annoyance with Things All John and Things All Todd.  I’m over John.  I never really liked the guy in the first place but come on!  Could he be just a little more ridiculous?  It’s all about John and all about what John wants.  It’s never about reality (in the soap world type of reality, that is) and honestly, he just completely bugs the poop out of me.  Then we’ve got Todd who, though I like him, I can’t stand this story anymore.  It’s been going on, what?  Five years now?  Get it over with already.  I think his son has aged at least ten years since this started and if it drags on much longer I will have to shoot my TV.  I do not care if he’s back with Blair.  As a matter of fact, I say let’s let everyone know the truth and then when Blair is sorry and such, have Todd tell her to stick it.  Blair has got to be the biggest idiot on the face of this earth.  I’m sorry but I just can’t stand her and her ignorance anymore.  She’s got to be deaf, dumb and blind to not see what an idiot she is.   

Oh, and everything I just wrote about Blair and the Todd storyline?  Change the names, adding Kevin and Kelly and I feel the same.  

What I still like about OLTL is Tess and Nash.  What’s going to happen to Tess?  Initially I thought they’d join Tess and Jess together but I’m starting to wonder.  Is there anyone out there that actually likes Jessica?  I know people love Tess, which says a lot about the “It’s not the actor, it’s the character” theory.  Tess is great.  She’s real.  Jess is boring and annoying and very much Emily-like with quite a few less “ums”.  Maybe there will be no integration.  Maybe Jess will simply disappear?  Or if there is an integration can Tess be the main personality?  I like her and if that’s the only way to keep Nash around then I’m all for it.  Let’s put Antonio with someone else.  Preferably someone who lives in another country.   

Now let’s go to the most disappointing show on the planet in my eyes…GH.   

I realize I am most likely the only one who does not enjoy the “old timers” being back.  Don’t get me wrong, I am a die hard fan of Tristan Rogers and was so happy to hear he signed on for a whole year, I think I may have cried.  I just don’t like what they’ve done to the character. 

Robert and Luke are what those of their era consider human superheroes.  They could do anything, handle anything and achieve anything they set out to.  Now they’ve been reduced to some lesser version of themselves.  The version that is just old, almost stupid and can be ‘had’ by a bunch of kids.  I don’t like that.  I want my human superheroes back.   I want the strength and the sexiness along with the comedy.  I don’t want lumps on the head and stupid fights with kids.  And I’m sorry but who is this Holly person?  Is she a bad joke or what?  This is not Holly.  This is some sad version of a comic character gone pathetic.  She was loyal.  She was smart and she was coy but she was never a blatant idiot.  (Again that word comes up!)  It’s like I’m watching my favorite characters though a carnival mirror. They’re all twisted and warped and I don’t like it.  No, I didn’t see Anna arrive yesterday and honestly, I’m afraid to watch.  Will the fact that she’s a bigamist even come up while she’s here?  Will Robert love her still or will he continue to be the shell of a man he once was and continue the ga-ga eyes for Holly?  Please God, get me out of bad writing hell and give me back my characters.   

Don’t even get me started with Lucky.  Yes, I’ve wanted him to have a storyline for years.  Yes, I wanted him with Liz for years.  But NO!  This is not what I wanted.  Stupid Lucky who has no clue is not a good Lucky.  If this is what we’re going to see of the character, bring back Jacob Young as Lucky and make Greg Vaughan someone who thought we was Lucky for Helena’s purposes.  Then give him a real story.  Is that too much to ask?  

I can’t begin to comment on any possible fun with tequila night because I had no emotional attachment. The only people I knew for a fact were friends that night were Liz and Emily.  I don’t recall the others having ever really shared any decent scenes together with any bonding so to me it was forced and fake.  Gone are the days of Flea, Chloe and Alexis having a connection.  If the writers want us to believe these gals are friends then give them something to connect with other than a walking penis and a few shots.   

I do sort of like that Jason told Alexis who her daughter is but I don’t like the reaction from Alexis.  Just because you gave birth to someone and after giving her up, found her again, doesn’t mean you will automatically love her.  Especially when that daughter is Sam, who has truly been a pain in the butt for Alexis for quite some time.  The story would have been much better if there would have been no emotional connection and we had to watch Alexis deal with that instead of the silly “Sam might die” story we’re getting.   

If someone gave me all of the flowers Sonny had for Emily I would have turned red, swelled up like a balloon and sneezed for days.  The gesture may have seemed nice to some but it verged on contrived to me.   

When do you think the car will be wrecked?   

I really need my soaps right now.  Prime time is ending for the summer and I need something new and refreshing to soak my mind when the kids are driving me nuts.  I rely on my soaps for this but I’m concerned.  I’m worried they won’t live up to my expectations.  Does this mean I’ll have to start watching Judge Judy?  

God help me.