April 2, 2006

I woke up this morning in an incredibly good mood, and I decided to get this all out of my system by putting it in my column – lucky you!  My thoughts were specifically of Zach, but imagine your favorite character/actor.  Hold that person in your mind as I gush.  Soaps are different than prime time shows and movies, in a way that is incredibly beneficial to the fans.  If your favorite character is in a front burner storyline, he or she is on three, four, maybe even five times a week.  Not in reruns.  Not in a movie played over and over again.  New material.  Multiple times a week.  I could watch Hugh Jackman in X-Men or Someone Like You multiple times a week, but even much-loved movies would get old fast.  When is his next flick coming out?  Months away.  I get to turn on my television tomorrow and see Zach saying all new lines, evoking new emotions and expressions – bringing me a whole new chapter in the life of a character I love.  Wow!   

You know what else is terrific about soaps?  They bring the stars to us.  Yesterday some friends of mine got to go see Alicia Minshew and Cameron Mathison at a public appearance in Florida.  That just doesn’t happen with movie stars or even prime time television stars.  Only on soaps are the stars out there connecting with the fans on a regular basis.  When you think about the fact that these actors are churning out fresh material each and every week, and then occasionally taking time out of their weekend to go meet the fans – it really gives you a great deal of admiration and respect for them.  I don’t know if any of you have read the book by Finola Hughes, Soapsuds, but if you weed out the drama added to make the story more juicy, you really see that these people work hard.  Smoochies to all of you, and my heartfelt thanks! 

Okay, gush over.  On to the show! 

The JR/Babe wedding night was really very sweet, but I was completely distracted by the fact that after bringing her into the room, he didn’t close the door.  He’s kneeling in front of her, about to burst into song, and all I can think about is that Winifred could walk by at any moment. 

You know, in weeks past I’ve worked myself up into a lather over Ryan, but it is really hard to maintain that much anger if I’m not given fresh material.  Oh, I was given some fresh material this week, when Kendall kept telling him to back off, and he kept pressuring her anyway.  Otherwise, however, he spent a lot of time with Julia, and was actually good with her.  Also, when he was in scenes with Kendall, there wasn’t the “oh, we’re about to kiss and have those old feelings come rising up like bile in Emeraldax’s throat” vibe going on.  Instead they maintained the much more interesting tension of two people trying to deal with a very bizarre, complicated, and life-changing situation. 

I don’t have a lot of feelings for Julia.  She either annoys me or doesn’t annoy me.  However, I found myself feeling bad for her this week.  Partly because she was victimized by Madden’s megalomania, but partly because of Josh’s treatment of her.  It has looked like, in weeks past, that Josh and Julia are being set up for a possible romance – one where they start out as adversaries and then eventually the sparks of anger turn into sparks of passion, blah blah blah.  Well, after this week, I don’t think I would be able to stomach it.  Verbal sparring is one thing.  Verbal abuse is another.  Josh was reprehensible to Julia this week.  He wasn’t just a jerk - he was a total pig.  Unless they plan to make him see the error of his ways, I mean really take him down about a dozen pegs, I don’t think even Julia deserves someone that nasty as a love interest.  Possible scenario:  he finds out she’s been volunteering at the free clinic, and so he decides to do it to – a nice glowing item for his resume – and through whatever drama there, he gets knocked off the pedestal he’s put himself on.  Cliché, but why not?  It would be much better than to watch her fall in love with him despite his nasty attitude. 

I love when a character uses the term “flippin” on the show.  David did that this week.  It’s always apparent what it is a substitute for, because no one actually uses that word in real life. 

I cackled with glee over the Kendall and Jonboy scenes.  It was just as I predicted – Kendall was totally freaked out when it finally hit her that he would become Uncle Jonboy to her child.  I loved it when he advanced upon her to touch her stomach, and then realized to his horror how that would look to a woman that he completely terrorized before they cut the bad out.   

Kelli Giddish as Di does such an excellent job of keeping up with Michael E. Knight and Tad’s eternal flip outlook on life.  When Tad isn’t being self-righteous, I love his sense of humor.  Only Tad could have a marriage proposal scene that silly. 

Hahahahaha – Greg said “…all my children.”  Hahahahha! 

I wonder if Val gets hazard pay working for Erica.  He’s been with her long enough that he just waits for her to get over herself, and then gets back to business. 

I have to complain about an editing choice this week.  I can’t say that I was all that interested in watching clips of “Erica” interviewing Martha Stewart.  But even that would have been more interesting than watching Erica watching clips of herself interviewing Martha Stewart.  The camera seemed to stay on Erica’s face an awful lot.   

The dream she had about poisoning Greg on her show was hysterical.  Ian Buchanan has been doing such a great job with him lately.  What was even more hysterical was when Erica woke up and went to visit him.  She would say something gushy to him, and he would smile at her, and I would crack up.  That smile of his…gawd it was funny.  Obsequious and gullible all at the same time.  If you want to buy a clue for poor Dr. Madden, call 1-800-HELP-GREG.  All of Erica’s former victims are standing by to take your donation. 

Kendall said “cheesy poofs!”  Is she a closet Cartman fan?  What happens when she and Zach get back together?  She’ll be watching South Park, doubled over in laughter, and Zach will be sitting there with his head cocked, wondering what the…?  Nah, it’s okay.  He’ll just read a book till the show is over, and then… 

Speaking of Kendall and Zach, I had to be revived with smelling salts a few times this week.  There have been some good Zen scenes in the past few weeks, but the ones this week….   Have mercy! </Jesse from Full House>  It helped that Kendall was finally, finally wearing a maternity dress to die for.  It was so absolutely gorgeous.  The hair and necklace, too – she just looked enchanting.  Zach was… well… captivated.  Squee!  I’ve decided that with summer approaching, Zach needs to forego the tie on a regular basis.  He was just so…. um… where are those smelling salts? 

The Fusion scenes were – wow, there was a lot going on there.  Everyone was looking gorgeous.  I’m really surprised Derek doesn’t have Dani locked in a tower, because she has to have loads of men clinging to her like pollen every time she goes to work in the morning.  The claws were out and the snark was flying.  Once again, even though I don’t want to have any sympathy for Babe, Alexa really brings it in a way that I just can’t help myself.  She’s been doing that ever since she came on the show, and it is very frustrating.  Kendall has every right to hate Babe and want her gone – because of what Babe did to Bianca and JR, and also because her being there is a daily reminder that Kendall’s best friend, Greenlee, wanted to stick it to her.  Yet, I found myself sympathizing with Babe.  Come on, Alexa, give me a break!  You’re killing me, here.  Similar situation with Amanda and Simone – I could sympathize with both of them. 

Three-way tie for line of the week – and they were all on Wednesday!  When Kendall said that Babe had some serious brass, Simone said, “Yeah, well, we've already established that. You and the hair.”  Then when Dixie was lamenting that David didn’t used to be this evil, and wondered if she did this to him, Zach nodded sympathetically and said, “No -- yeah, I'm sure you did. Because before you left, he was more like Gandhi, right?”  Lastly, when Ryan commented that what Erica really wanted was for him to let her have her own way, she responded “Oh, I wish some of my husbands had had your insight.”  

Interesting JR and Krystal scene this week.  He was putting on the fake charm, she wasn’t buying it.  He had that grudging look of admiration for her and pity for his father as he contemplated fish in the drapes. 

I had to laugh at Dr. Madden working over Amanda – talking about how his son is so cruel and manipulative.  Ha!  His Papa Madden demeanor with her was so eeeeevil.  Is Dr. Madden one of those shades of gray types that has moments of genuine compassion for others when they aren’t pawns in his Master Plan?  Or is Amanda part of his Master Plan?  I’m reminded of one of my favorite Will and Grace quotes.  Will says, “There is no master plan!  Don’t say master!  Don’t say plan!” 

The nurse at the mental institution really needs to read the Pine Valley Bulletin more often.  If she had, then she would have known that leaving JR alone in a room with Janet was a Bad Idea.  

More sympathies this week:  Poor Chief Joe.  I knew it was killing him to have David on staff at his hospital, but it didn’t occur to me till this week that it is equally as galling to have Dr. Madden on staff.  He’s surrounded by God Complexes!  Of course, he is still delusional when it comes to Josh – he truly has no idea that his own grandson suffers from the same inflated ego as Hayward and Madden.   

The scenes between Madden and Dixie were very good.  I floved the way she quietly said “You absolute scum of the earth.”  Greg kept coldly telling her not to be so rude, and she kept right on flatly telling him what she thought of him.  Delicious!  Greg’s façade slipped for a moment, and we got the first genuine evil little smile from him. 

Dixie is reluctant to tell anyone (including the audience) what happened to her during the past few years.  But Zach made her face the fact that she isn’t the only one who has been victimized by Madden, and she has the power to make it stop.  “He’s treating the woman I love – let’s have it!”  Le sigh.

Thanks for reading. Cheers!

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