Seasons of My Life, By Maxine Bennett

"When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie..that's amore" is a song that was sung by Dean Martin. It was also sung in the movie "Moonstruck." I don't know about you but when that moon hits me in the eye I deem a wake up call.

At this stage of my life, peers are moving from here to retire or sadly dying. A few years ago a good friend passed away. He and his wife and my husband and myself met here in Vegas. Coincidently, we all came from the same section of the Bronx. The wife and I went to the same JHS. However, we didn't connect until they moved here. He had a stroke at 56 years old and was placed in ICU and then in a nursing home. She had to sell all of her IRA's and other investments to make ends meet to pay the hospital bills even though she did have some medical insurance. How many of us save and save until we feel it's safe to spend? How many of us ever feel it's safe to spend? How many of us can save? And how many of us do save?

The husband died less than a year later and there was no life insurance. A very small pension and luckily she worked. So between the pension and her working she is just about making it.

Observing all of this really had me thinking about my mortality. When one is 17 years old it's is a belief that we can live forever. How many of us feel that in our heads we are still 21 years old but realize when we look at our recent photos or if you can, the mirror see someone who remotely looks like you but in your mind you are saying.. ME? Can't Be!!

This wake up call that I got made both my husband and I plan for our future. Now we all know that a future can never really be planned for. There is an old expression.." you plan and plan and then G-d laughs in your face." However as much of planning as we are allowed, we did. We wrote a will. We found out we didn't need to go to an attorney to do this. We really do not have much to leave anyway. I have a clown collection and my General Hospital memorabilia. I have a feeling once I am gone, my son will throw out Bozo and Luke. Both my husband and I want to be cremated. In the Jewish religion that is frowned upon. Our son tried to talk us out of that too. I wont know the difference once I am gone.

With the handwritten will in place, promising my healthy organs to help others. Hoping there is a little money left from the sale of this house or any home to go to the kids, and some insurance money too we are somewhat set.

The wake up call also including living. Living and trying something new every day. Opening that new window. Allowing myself to experience things that I don't normally allow myself to do. Not being afraid of meeting new people and challenges. And most of all cleaning house.

NO NO I do not mean cleaning this house. I mean getting rid of things and people who need to be cut loose from my life. As I open this new window every day I realize as I let new people into my life, that some people need to leave. Since the weight loss, some have told me I have changed. I really do not know if that is true. I might be a little more confident and not allow others to walk all over me. And perhaps a little less nervous about attending an event where I know no one. However, I do know I cannot deal with being around negativity. I am not talking about someone who might share with me their bad day or a problem they might be having. That's called venting and friendship. However I cannot be with someone who cannot ever appreciate life. This life is a gift. We only go around once and there is no rehearsal. It's the real show. We all have issues and ailments but if we turn them around and make a negative into a positive, it truly becomes a blessing. So when that moon hit's your eye life a big pizza pie, sit down, slice it up with your best friends and family and enjoy that moment in time.