November 14, 2005  

Jack should learn how to convey righteous indignation without being hypocritical.  His being upset over Ryan’s allegedly former violent tendencies seem to ring false when he punches people, grabs people, explodes all over people.  Erica wants to protect Kendall from Ryan.  She doesn’t mind throwing Greenlee to the wolf.  It’s a different story with her daughter.  I had to laugh at her and Jackson arguing over whether Greenlee or Kendall was the bigger twit in coming up with their surrogacy plan.  How about we call them both twits and move on?  

The blood on Ryan’s teeth as he woke up from being hit was a nice touch.  Gross, but authentic!  

Oooh, Aidan is pissed at what Ryan did.  The bitter, cynical side of me says that the only reason he isn’t worshipping at the altar of St. Ryan is because the writers needed to create conflict between him and Erin.  Otherwise, he’d be genuflecting with the rest of the town.  He did a fantastic job of putting the Lavery brothers in their place.  I think it’s the cockney accent.  It has a way of making what is being spoken about seem even more ridiculous.  “Bloody Laverys.”  I have to agree.  Even sweet little sister is capable of violence. 

 “Chief French Frye.” “Girl on girl action, and I mean that in the sluttiest possible way.” “This is what’s known as a Chandler.” “Assault and bitchery.”  “Shotgun!”  “How come veins are blue again?” “Hell might spit her back.”  

I think the only thing saving the drunk driving debacle storyline are the awesome one-liners from JR and a few from Derek.  Somebody needs to keep plying him with liquor to keep me entertained.  Otherwise I may fall asleep.  I was glad to finally hear Babe’s rationale for taking the blame on herself.  It didn’t suck.  But the storyline as a whole sucks, so lets just move it along quickly. 

Zach was just amazing as he talked about Kendall to Di.  It was hilarious when Di turned into the Greek Chorus and told him that if he would just tell her how he feels, then maybe she would melt in his arms.   

I really have to contrast the scenes between Zach and Di and the scenes between, say, Nikolas and Courtney on GH.  Similar situations – both having problems with their love interests.  Both feeling down in the dumps.  Both find themselves kissing unexpectedly.  Yet, such a world of difference.  The AMC version was so much more classy.   

I am definitely loving World Weary Di.  She plays “old soul” very well.  Kelli Giddish is apparently younger than Jacob Young, yet she seems older because of her classic features.  She does great when waxing philosophical in that serene way of hers.  I guess that is why I didn’t like her in the Dragon storyline – she spent so much time on edge and afraid, that the serenity was missing.  But if it accomplished one thing, it gave her a background.  An intriguing, sympathetic background. 

Does Julia really hang out at home in a cocktail dress?  I guess I’m glad that Wildwind isn’t my home so I wouldn’t have to live up to it.  What had to be the best scene in forever – “I threw myself at Zach Slater.”  “You, too?”  So. well. played.  I was howling. 

It was clear who Ryan wanted to save first.  Greenlee is most definitely his biggest priority.  Even after learning about the baby, he was all about saving Greenlee first.   

Kendall was asking for Zach!  So he obliges her by coming to visit and declaring his love for her.  After making sure she was fast asleep, of course, because the Slaters have been married only 6 months – its way too early to start sharing feelings while conscious.  Then he leaves because (I believe) he thinks she hates him and doesn’t want to distress her by being there when she wakes up.  SIGH.   

The scene where Greenlee was telling Ryan to leave her and go find his brother was painful to watch.  Its like when you see an alcoholic fall off the wagon.  You think, here we go again.  Ryan once again has to keep running after Jonathan while his wife stays behind and fumes. 

Tsk! Poor Ryan - acting annoyed at Greenlee for persisting in seeing Jonathan as a threat.  I guess it didn’t help that she and Zach were double-teaming him.  He did a good job of deflecting away from his own assiness by angling Greenlee’s indignation back onto Zach.  It resulted in her telling The Lie to Kendall that Zach didn’t visit her after all.  I’m not going to call her Greenbitch, though.  Or say anything along the lines that she should be smited and rot in hell.  I’m above calling a fictional character the scummiest piece of chewed up gum that ever got stuck underneath the table at a local greasy spoon.  So I’m not going to do it.  Aren’t you proud of me? 

I had to laugh when Greenlee said that resistance is futile, since I’ve read in some message boards the Laverys referred to as the Lavery Borg Collective.  When Greenlee was grilling Dr. Madden about the tests he wanted to run, it would have been funny if he replied, “Well, Greenlee, since it is my baby in Kendall’s womb, and since the freaks in my family go way back for generations, I thought it might be prudent to have a little look-see.  What do you think?” 

Standing ovation to Erica for putting Kendall and Greenlee in their place.  She was dead-on calling them little girls with a secret.  She even admonishes them to go to sleep as she walks out the door, just like a mom at a slumber party. 

Erica was eerily calm as she was handling Jonathan.  Either she was not that afraid, or she has just had to deal with so many psychos over the course of her life, that it’s becoming old hat.  Actually, I think Jonathan featured on New Beginnings would be a ratings bonanza.  Viewers would flock to see if the psycho with the tumor removed ended up murdering the show’s host. 

Jonathan and Lily together was just as jarring as Jonathan and Greenlee last week.  Everyone talking at once is bad enough.  Everyone screeching at once has me pressing the mute button. 

Hmm…Jonathan is alone as he talks to Braden’s grave.  He is not acting different, so it would seem that his behavior is genuine.  It’s a trap! 

Thursday was true confessions day for the wackos in town.  Jonathan and Amanda listed out their crimes, and then said they were sorry with such contrite expressions.  Oh, come here and give me a big hug, you silly kids!  Or not. 

When Sam was opening the safe, I half expected Jonathan to come up behind him.  When Sam pulled out the gun, I was hoping Julia was going to come up behind him and kick his ass.  I actually got a chill when Jonathan said to Sam “Just tell me what to do,” and Sam told him to get on his knees.  Oh, Sam is such a sociopath in training.  Julia was telling him not to do it because it would haunt Sam for the rest of his life.  Actually, I think if he had killed Jonathan, it would have given him a thirst for more.  Brrr. 

“The cherry on the psycho sundae.”  That about sums up the week. 

I didn’t include Friday’s action in my commentary because I am off at Super Soap Weekend.  I’m writing this Thursday night, but I know it isn’t getting posted till Monday, which is when I get back home.  I’m hoping that everything went well and that you’ll be getting a report of my activities.  Behold the t-shirt I plan to wear on Saturday:

Thanks for reading.  Cheers!