Recently, a good friend
of mine was discussing a family problem. Her daughter and my friend's
husband and father of this young lady were at odds. It seems that the
daughter was sharing a situation at work where she as an attorney
would have to face going to trial. She is by no means a trial attorney
but since the case was taken by her firm and her firm had the
confidence in her, I truly believe she would succeed. However, while
discussing her dilemma and not telling too much due to lawyer/client
confidentiality, her father told her "chances are you are going to
lose the case."
Now we all know that was
just an opinion and a slip of the tongue. Who hasn't opened her/his
mouth and wished we could put the words right back? As we know, that
is an impossibility. So now the daughter, who is as nervous as a cat
worrying about this trial, says to her dad, (I am paraphrasing of
course), "You've never been there for me... you are never on my
side... you never thought I would succeed."
I've known this family for 16 years and of course would never have
guessed that the dad was never there for his child, wife or other
daughter. He was a coach for the baseball team she was on, helped her
with her homework, worked with my friend with the Brownies and Girl
Scouts, schleped more than once her furniture from Las Vegas to
Northern CA, every time she moved, cried at her wedding (with joy),
cried at her graduations and now she believes he wasn't there for her?
WHY DO WE ALL NEED THAT
PAT ON THE BACK?? I know there are days when I accomplish something
major for me and wish my folks were here to say, "Good going. Maxine."
I know when my grandson does something remarkable, which of course,
speaking like a true grandma, is every day, he is told, "Good
signing," "Good alphabet," "Good potty training" or "Good dancing."
This past weekend, I was at the General Hospital fan event in Studio
City. I got to meet people who I hadn't seen literally in years. I had
a ball. I hung around with people who are always there for me as I
hope I am for them. We were constantly laughing and offering support
in lifting and carting and relaxing, as well as eating. Again, the
necessary PAT ON THE BACK.
I know my friend's
daughter and husband will find their way back and like each other
again. I also know how absolutely blessed I am to have so many people
in my supportive window. I do not believe I will ever shun the PAT ON
THE BACK. After hearing this story, I know that I will support whoever
needs my support even when I might believe they don't want it. Funny
how we take so many things for granted. I also know how quickly the
world can change and the support that once was there isn't.
Be there to PAY IT FORWARD. It can never hurt to be there for a friend
or a foe.