December 17, 2007

‘Tis the Season to talk smack! 

So, I missed recording Daytime Confidential ABC Edition last week! I missed WUBS Queen Karen! WHAAAAA! I love her. My internet was off due to the massive ice storms that ravaged the Midwest that week. My thoughts and prayers go out to all effected by last weeks ice storm and this weeks snow storm. It's not quite a blizzard in Missouri but the kids LOVE IT! I hope you are all warm and well! Even though I missed recording it, I thoroughly enjoyed listening to the pod cast but I feel left out so to quote one of my favorite movies: “I Won’t Be Ignored!* Here are my answers to TV Fan Online Luke’s yearly round up questions:

Who am I most impressed with this last year on ABC daytime? Diane Miller.  She is the freshest new character to grace our screens in years. She has endless potential for current and future storylines and her back story is just waiting to be told. Diane is a gold mine!

Favorite couple: Luke and Tracy. It took years of Laura being gone for us to accept Luke with another woman. The fans REVOLTED when they tried to put Luke with Felecia. More fans were ready to accept Skye and Luke but he turned around and pimped her out to Lorenzo for his own nefarious reasons and that blew that. With Tracy he has met his match and for me I would not want Laura to come back if she was going to break them up.

Hero: ABC daytime really has no heroes. Every one is tainted, tarnished and painted with the same brush; they are all criminals in some way. The only people who have not been reduced to felonious activities (IMO to make the criminals they want to force us to accept as the stars of the show) would be Epiphany, Patrick, Robin, Leyla, Nadine, Regina, and the rock and roll cardiologist, Dr. Julian. Since Dr. J saved Maxie on Night Shift and has now saved Luke, I guess that’s my hero for this year.

Horror: James Craig. As I said on the TV Fan Online Forums, “I hate James Craig. I hate that the terrorist is now on my TV after murdering Alan Q. I hate that they expect me to believe he is Jerry Jacks. No freaking way in heaven or on earth. I hate that he is polluting the air around Alexis. I hate that he has anything to do with Jax. I hate every word he speaks and every breath he takes. He is a foul stench emanating from this show like the dust cloud that surrounds the Charlie Brown character of Pig Pen.”

Most over used plot device: This is a hard one; babies in peril, maybe? Or who’s the daddy? Villains that were supposed to be temporary hired on full time and given contracts? The genre is mired in a cesspool of regurgitation. Original thought seems to have been outlawed on threat of death. All the drama is placed in plot devices instead of taking the trouble to write real life drama. Instead of using socially relevant topics such as issues of aging, the family drama involved in long term relationships and raising children, single parenthood, hardships of young medical and nursing students or using the hospital as a basis for “House” or “Grey’s Anatomy” plots; they instead insist on a few over used contrivances. Shame on you, ABC! Shame. On. You.

Most wasted talent: Leslie Charleson, Ron Hale and Constance Towers! Hands down! Runners up: Wally Kurth, Jacklyn Zeman, Denise Alexander, Stuart Damon, Rick Springfield, Jane Elliot (to a lesser degree) Honorable mention: Blake Gibbons, Derk & Drew Cheetwood, Bergen Williams, Adrian Alvarado and Jason Gerhardt. Irene Kristen, Cat Hickland. This list goes on a bit more: Timothy Stickney, Patricia Mauceri (Carlotta Vega), Tika Sumpter, Tobias Truvillion and last but not least Sean Ringgold. I’m not willing to swing off into a list of All My Children actors at this time. I don’t feel qualified to do so yet. You guys send me the list from AMC and I’ll see that the most repeated names in my mail get on the end of the year list.

Most wasted storyline (they didn’t ask this but they should have): Everyday Heroes. Just because the boss lady is gone doesn’t mean this couldn’t be a viable option to Sam’s sitting in wait to sabotage Lucky. I like strong and independent Sam so much better than whining revenge mess Sam. The show could have been a nice counterpart to the hospital and the mob much like Tiffany Hill’s television show used to be. This is a missed opportunity! Couldn’t Tiffany Hill step in? *note Friday 12/14 Sam mentioned her job, so this might actually be picked up on, but I’m not holding my breath!

Worst storyline: The death of Alan Quartermaine and the subsequent deification of his murderer, the terrorist James Craig and the re-writing of history to “attempt” to force us to accept the murdering thug as Jerry Jacks. Yes, it is worse than killing off Emily; worse than breaking up Scrubs, worse than Ely Love, worse than just about anything we saw on any of the ABC soaps. Yes, worse than Miles blackmailing Marty to marry him, worse than Babe and Kwak getting by with whatever it was they did, worse than Spencer f*cking Truman, and by golly damn that is saying a whole lot!

All My Children

How familiar this is! One of the (very) few core characters on this show that still interests me, Tad Martin, they have behaving in a way I abhor. Are they trying to ruin that one small bit of love that I still hold for this show? It’s not that I am not sympathetic to him, but I loathe stories that have one parent keeping another parent out of their child’s lives.  I know that he is not the same person (character) now that he has committed murder and mayhem and what all ever it is that they had him doing while I wasn’t watching but it still galls me to see him behaving this way. It’s not an easy thing for me though, because Adam is one of the few characters I love also. He has never been played as anything but a greedy, viscous, egotistical maniac yet I have yearned to see him put those things behind him and find his value as decent human being. Clearly to no avail.

Sadly, and believe me, I know this is going to generate hate mail, but truth is truth: I rather like Zack and Greenlee’s dynamic while they are in the bunker. It isn’t just the kiss, although that was hotter than some of the forced relationships I’ve seen on this show (Ryan and anyone). I like the way they have been forced to communicate. Whatever happens in the future these two can not help but understand each other better than they did before. That has to be a good thing, right?  

One Life to Live

Oh, nasty has found a new name and it is Jared! He was kissing Natalie in the promos! My face is permanently scrunched up in this sickened, traumatized, Friends “Joey acts like he smells a fart” mask of revolt. As much as I love One Life to Live (and I love One Life to Live right now), I do not find this titillating in the least.

Llanview, Pennsylvania is about to meet Paris, Texas in a major way. Spoilers are out; rumors are running hot and heavy. I find myself riveted to the TV. As tired as I hear everyone was getting of the Marcie/Baby What’s-his-name kidnapping, it is good to see these two elements about to collide. I mentioned on the ABC Edition of Daytime Confidential a few broadcasts back that I loved Moe and Noelle (the chef, owner and head waitress at the Bon Jour Café). I mentioned that I thought they would make a cute couple. Someone (sorry I can’t recall who) stated that that may be true but how were they going to get from the Bon Jour to Llanview? Well, did you catch it? This week, Dorian was talking to David and she was raving about Moe being the chef at that truck stop and I did that cheerleader jump combined with the “YES!” pump-fist in the air. I ended up laughing at myself over it but I thought it would be cool to share it with you. I can see how they would end up in Pennsylvania now, don’t you?

If Ron Carlivati, the head writer at One Life to Live, continues in the manner he has started out this could be the “IT” soap next summer. I hope that he stays consistent with his fresh ideas and doesn’t turn to plot contrivances anytime soon because this show is kicking butt!  Even the teens on this show are really good. I have minor issues with some of the delivery, but all in all, Starr, Langston and Cole are really in a staging position for a fantastic coming of age story played out over this coming summer. Think about it; Langston is going to be raised by Starr’s Aunt Dorian, Starr is snapping at Langston to mind her own business over Cole, Langston is capable of understanding Cole’s loss so much better than pampered princess Starr, as is Cole better able to understand her than Marco who has been unfortunately left out of a large part of this developing story. I hope he isn’t written out to play the two girls off each other for Cole, because frankly I just can’t see Cole as being that hot and tasty.

Besides which, Marco and a few of the other prom musical high school students are needed to set the stage properly. We need the tough as nails cheerleading bimbo, the smart girl longing to be part of the “in” crowd, a geek, a freak and jokester. I know I’m wearing my rose colored glasses but I am so getting in to One Life to Live right now I can’t help but dream of more to come! Viki reaching out to Charlie could be so good, even if Dorian and Charlie are also “making friends."  Nora and Clint might be pretty entertaining, too. Then there is Talia and Antonio and I think that they are going to be wildly hot. Of course, it could be sentimental slop, too, but all soaps can so easily!

General Hospital

I have heard a lot of tripe recently about General Hospital being the new Passions because of Alan and Emily but I can not agree with that. Passions never ended a storyline the entire time the show was on the air. They did liberally screw around with supernatural happenings that, in my opinion, were not their downfall. Passions' downfall was the lack of story endings. So far, General Hospital is not in that category, thankfully. They end their stories. They may rely too heavily on plot devices to do so or even end them in ways that are completely unacceptable but at least they still make a stab at beginnings and middles and ends (some of them crappy); unlike Passions.

Luke’s trip to hell was… well, a trip to hell for me. They did it SO MUCH BETTER a few years ago when Luke had his Christmas Carol dream. Skye was a creepy reproduction of Liz Hurley in Bedazzled but she was a piss poor choice as his guide. Skye looked great and she did a fine job in the role, but what an odd choice! Hello? Skye is still alive and well. It should have been someone who has died and gone to hell. More than the little scenario played out of screaming kids and babies and Scott having everything Luke ever wanted a more appropriate hell for Luke would have been being stuck at Wyndemere with Mikko and Stavros and Stefan. It was a fun little break from the day to day mobster crap but it was a waste of time as far as I can see.

As far as the Mob, second verse, same as the first? Not so fast. This time I am seeing eerie similarities between Johnny Zacchara and our very own son of AJ, future mafia kingpin, ruthless, “No Mercy” Michael. It is also paralleling Jason’s insecurities about raising a child in the business. Those factors more than the actual mob element, more than Lulu and Logan paralleling Scott and Laura as they attempt to add Johnny to the mix in the role of Luke, could make this mob story, this time stand out from the rest. When you add Trevor trying to play Sonny against Johnny, in an effort to undermine them both it changes things up. You have a new element in it this time, too: Kate Howard. If she is *seriously* going to stand up to him about her independence then I am whole heartedly behind them.  I seem to remember people saying the same thing back when feisty, fiery, Bet-her-booty-on-the-turn-of-a-card Sam first got involved with Sonny too. I most certainly do not want to see any repeat of the Sonny Tames the Shrew show. It’s time for Sonny to see that he can’t have everything he wants the way he wants it. Now that’s a Corinthos story line I’d LIKE to see!

Next week, join me for an update from the groups and forums on the Save the Quartermaines initiative and my own Best and Worse of 2007. Until then…

See ya!